Humans spend the majority of their lives trying to avoid pain and suffering. It’s a natural instinct, no one wants to feel pain. Suffering comes from not accepting the pain and not allowing it to move through us. Pain is mandatory, suffering is optional. Pain and suffering aren’t synonymous, though they are paired together. It is often painful just being human, we have painful longings and yearning within us that can’t always be explained. Pain comes to us in so many forms, whether the natural pain of growth or childbirth but there are other forms of pain that we endure. The pain of a separation. The pain of losing someone you love. The pain of rejection. The pain of betrayal. The pain of fear.

pain(n.)

late 13c., peine, “the agony suffered by Christ;” c. 1300, “punishment,” especially for a crime, “legal punishment of any sort” also “condition one feels when hurt, opposite of pleasure,” including mental or emotional suffering, grief, distress; from Old French peine  “difficulty, woe, suffering, punishment, Hell’s torments”

suffering(n.)

mid-14c., “the patient enduring of pain, inconvenience, loss, etc.;” late 14c.; “undergoing of punishment, affliction, etc; verbal noun from suffer (v.) mid-13c., sufferen, “allow to occur or continue, refrain from hindering, fail to prevent or suppress,” also “be made to undergo, endure, be subjected to” ,
https://www.etymonline.com/

Suffering as a state is the above outlined description; the patient enduring of pain. Suffering as a state is the endurance of pain or loss. The action or experience of suffering is punishment, it is a state that is inflicted onto someone, not inherent beyond the state of enduring the pain itself. Suffering, while it is attached to pain, is not inherent beyond its state. Suffering is something that we inflict upon ourselves through our state of mind. Suffering comes when we resist. Suffering comes when we say, “I don’t want this…”

Pain is inevitable. Suffering comes or doesn’t come, dependent upon how we handle that pain. What is the story we are telling ourselves about the pain?
“This sucks…” “I can’t believe this!” “Can you believe what she did to me?” “Did you hear what he said?” “I can’t believe I am laid up in this hospital bed.” “This is total bullshit.”

There is a whole onslaught of things that run through our minds the moment something happens until our minds are more controlled. It is tempting to believe the things that are running through our head because the narrator sounds like us but that’s the mistake. That’s the peanut gallery who has a judgment for every action, word and situation that you encounter! That is the peanut gallery who lives with the spirit of offense. That is the peanut gallery who is always the victim and never does anything wrong. That is the peanut gallery who is forever and endlessly narrating your life as if you aren’t already aware of what is going on. Ignore it, its only end is to make something out of nothing!

The peanut gallery loves to wallow and stew and spew about everything. It is what it does best. It loves to create its little stories about everything that happens in your life even if the story isn’t true. It does this because it seeks to fill in the blanks, to make a complete picture, even if the pieces aren’t the right ones. The stories aren’t accurate, they’re fabricated. The ego loves to have the upper hand in life, so it weaves stories and explanations for everything, in order to give it the illusion of control. If ego thinks it knows what is going on, it has a false sense of peace. This is why it feels so scary and risky to ‘not need to know,’ everything. This is why the peanut gallery is always running its mouth in a desperate attempt to maintain control by having the inside scoop even if it’s a lie. Stop believing the lie thus ending suffering in your life.

So, why would we believe the story of suffering when pain comes? Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional. Pain ends. It comes and goes. Suffering is optional, suffering is the story, the meaning we give behind our pain. Meaning isn’t tangible like pain is. Meaning is the explanation, our own viewpoint, the way we feel about it. Feelings come and go if we allow them to. A feeling is meant to pass right through us if we allow it to. We are not obligated to assign meaning to pain, pain happens. It will happen whether there is a label attached to it or now. In fact, it will leave faster if we don’t assign a meaning to it because once we do assign a meaning to it, it attaches to us. We have made it ours, we ‘named’ it. Just like naming a baby when it is born or naming a new beloved pet when we adopt one. Do not assign meaning to your pain, allow it to be what it is and allow it to pass through you.

Since I stopped assigning meaning to my pain, I don’t suffer. I don’t suffer myself by assigning meaning to my pain. Did you know that another word that is interchangeable for the word meaning in this circumstance is also; value? To give something meaning, is to also assign value to it. Do you want to assign value to something that you don’t want? Have no thought about it, allow it to be what it is and allow it to pass through you. Grieve, release, cry, let it pass. Don’t give something greater value than what was meant to be a temporary feeling.
I hope this helped someone today, thank you guys for being here with me. I deeply understand the misery of pain and suffering. My life changed tremendously once I figured this out. So, I hope it helps! I just want to see people get free from the trappings of this life and this world.

Blessings xx